Dialect Conversation

One day, W.E.B. Du Bois met a creature from the planet Rebusia. They struck up a conversation. Du Bois said, "Well, hello there. My names is W.E.B. Du Bois. Where do you hail from?"

"Ah hahl from the planet Rebusia. Ah'm fixin' to learn more about your planet. Ah a-heard your presahdent's name is B. Hussein Obama," responded the creature.

"You mean President Obama? He is a very historic president. The first African American president. Imagine that. I can see that America has become less racist. What would you like to learn about him?" said Du Bois.

"We a-heard that he supports alternatahve fuel sources. Rebusia done need alternatahve fuel sources. Where are they?" said the creature excitedly.

"Well, they aren't very developed yet. There is a lot of solar in California, and wind power--," said Du Bois before he was interrupted.

"Solar? What's that? No, we a-need oahl. Lots of oahl," said the creature, "Ah heard you guys are workin' on your tax polahcy. Do you thahnk Ah could sell some stock here?"

"Well, President Obama recently compromised with Republicans over tax deductions, so I suppose so," said Du Bois, with a confused look.

"Great, Ah'm a fixin' for some cheese toast. Have any restaurants here?" said the creature.

"Actually, there is a great eatery in Harlem. I know the owner." said Du Bois.

"Nahce. One last thang. Do you have the number to Comcast? Ah need cable so ah can stop watchin' lamestream media." said the creature.

"I don't actually," said Du Bois, "I don't watch TV."

"What? You don't watch Top Chef All Stars?" exclaimed the creature.

"Nope, I think TV is a waste of time." said Du Bois.

"That's a shame." said the creature.